Why I’m Single – Reason # 34

Dear Deadbeat Father/Boyfriend/Lover/Man;

You didn’t know you had to actually make a living when you met her? You didn’t know you had to actually WORK, make money, get on that grind? You forgot about the bills you accumulated when you and her decided to shack up and be miserable live happily ever after? You forgot huh? You thought since she was the main money maker, the one with the actual career, that you didn’t have to do too much right?

And then she got pregnant. ‘Cuz you thought it’d be the perfect time to start that family. ‘Cuz, what else is there to do at this point in your lives? You were being selfish. You wanted her home, barefoot and pregnant, catering to your every whim, kinda like how your great-grandmother did with your great-grandfather. We sure as hell know your mother didn’t do that with your father. Your mother was too busy being selfish too, fucking around behind his back. It all makes sense doesn’t it? What was Freud’s theory?

And now here you are. Unemployed. Bills stacked up. Collectors knocking down your high mortgaged home. While you sleep ’til 2pm and stay up ’til 4am smoking your weed. Do I need to say it? Do I really need to speak it out loud?

Get a fucking life you miserable fucking fuck. Do something. That unappreciated woman is going to wake up and take herself and her unborn child, YOUR future spawn out of your life. She won’t be stupid her whole life you know? She WILL wake up.

I hope……

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