The Trouble With Trouble.

I love me some trouble…..

Lemme tell you about my boy Trouble…..

His government name started with a “T” and that’s what I called him. He was pretty. And I don’t like referring to any of my boytoys male friends as “pretty”, but that’s what he was. Pretty.

But ironically, he had a chin cleft. Which I’d read years ago to be equivalent to a “devilish personality”. So that made him my pretty devil. And that’s all I’m going to say about that.

We met over a year and a half ago on that social networking site that I will not mention because I talk about it all the time and you should know it by now.

I don’t even know how to explain it, don’t know how it started, I don’t know how it got so serious and so intense so soon but it did.

He was stationed in Ohio for work that I cant mention here for fear that he’ll read this and we became instantly disappointed at the distance between us. He couldn’t travel because of his job and I couldn’t travel because, well, because I have responsibilities that debilitate me from doing so. *My “Supermom” post is coming soon.*

We would text each other our fantasies and our wishes, our dreams and our goings-ons. We’d email photos back and forth and exchange stories and have long conversations about anything and everything imaginable in this God given universe. He was the first person I’d speak to in the morning and the last one at night, sometimes into the wee hours of the morning.

We clicked. Did I say that already? And I became smitten. As did he. He made me feel like I had a chance at….dare I say it? Nah, I’ll let you figure that out.

Summer came and my children were going on vacation with their father within the next few weeks.

*screeches to a halt* Come again?! The children were going where? With who?!

This was something that’d never happened before. I was going to be left alone, without my children for the first time in my life. That meant no responsibilities for a week. What was I going to do with my time? I’d go crazy without my children for a week!!

I mentioned this to “T” and immediately it was like the Red Sea had parted:

“How about you come down here? I will pay for your gas and expenses. This way, I can take your mind off missing your children. We can spend some time seeing the sights. We can do some exploring together and maybe even cause a little bit of trouble ourselves. And we will know for certain if this spark and connection we have is indeed real”.

I didn’t give him a definite answer. I had to pray about this. I had to talk to my mentors, I had to get feedback, I had to drink and smoke and do anything conceivable to make this decision easier.

Now, I’m not going to say my inner circle is ignorant; maybe “careful” (overly so) and apparently, as I came to find out at a later date, I was the only stupid dumb bitch woman who WASN’T taking advantage of such a situation *This too will be a future post*. EVERYONE I mentioned this to had something negative to say. *Speak it unto the universe and it shall be – hint: another post*.

Except for my adventurous friend Sophia. She’s a hopeless romantic who believes in love at first sight and shiny knights on white unicorns who’ll sweep a woman off her feet.

“You’ll regret it if you don’t go LL”, she pleaded with me. “What’s the worse that can happen? You don’t get along? You have your car, just turn around and come back home! You need to do this for me and for you and for him!”

The days leading up to my children’s departure was, needless to say, heart wrenching. Add on anxious, stressful, unnerving, tense and strung. I still wasn’t sure whether I was making this trip to Ohio to see my online lover but regardless, I packed my childrens bags.

And then I packed my own.

I googled, I checked, I researched, I MapQuest’d the directions to Ohio and the nearest hotel. I had my vehicle checked out and changed the oil and had everything ready to make the 430.68 mile road trip to Ohio. If I left at the same time that my children left via plane, I could get to “T” by morning.

I prayed and prayed and prayed. I bid my children farewell and cried and prayed some more. I wanted a sign. I needed a sign from above, a sign to keep me from driving to my online lover.

I got a sign alright. Just before I crossed into the U.S. border.

So instead, I detoured and on a last minute, crazy whim of mine that only someone as crazy as MizzLippz could fathom…..

…….I drove to NY.

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