Am I The Only NON-Drama Baby Mama?

First off, let me just express my dislike of the term “Baby Mama”. Ew. Can we just all agree to say ex-girlfriend, ex-lover or ex-wife? Thanks. Now moving on…..

Because this is MY blog, I have every single damn right to self-praise so imagine my big, fat mouth yelling this at the top of my lungs right about now:


Girls, girls, girls ’cause you are not worthy of being called a “woman” can you grow the fuck up? There’s a reason you’re not together, there’s a reason it didn’t work out. Do you really find it necessary to contact your ex’s new flavour-of-the-month to tell her your ex is scum? WHO CARES?!?!!? He’s not yours anymore. He’s not your business. Nor is it her business that he failed to buy your kid the latest pair of Jordans. Do you not see how insecure/jealous/stupid you’re being?

My girlfriend is currently seeing a man who has 9 children from 3 different women. Yes, you read that correctly. Nine children. Three women. I don’t even know what to say about this really. I’ll just pass on this for now.

Shortly after mine and my ex-husband’s separation, he got into that rebound love right quick. He figured it’d be the best way to forget me if he attempted to move on. Sidenote: We’re going on 7 years of separation and we’re both still single but I’ll discuss this another time. Anyhoot, because I’m not a hater and speak the truth 98.7% of the time, I will admit that this lady friend of his was 10 years younger and 20 pounds ok 100 pounds lighter than I and very cute indeed. Oh of course my heart strings tugged for about a minute. And all I said to the girl when she and my ex came by to pick up MY CHILDREN for a play date at the local theme park was, “Very nice to meet you. Please watch my children. They’re a handful” and watched them zip away like a cozy, little family.

And then I went inside and sobbed for an hour and called my best friends who took me out to get drunk.

I did not, not ne’er, not one damn, single, time attempt communication with this new lady friend of his. What for? To give her power over me? To belittle myself and display acts of crazy, jealous, bitter exes? I’m better than that. Yes, you heard me. I’m. Better. Than. That.

Another sidenote: My ex’s lady friend is a Facebook friend of mine, even though she and my ex are no longer together. I’ve told you many times – I’m not normal.

I’m too carefree and easygoing to be petty. It’s not my style. And I WILL always remain the bigger person. Unless of course the bitch wants to get all up in my face wherein I’ll kick the shit out of her.

The same goes for any new lady friends of his trying to contact THE MOTHER. Bitches need to realize, you’re THE MOTHER of his kids. Regardless of whether he hates you, wants to kill you, or thinks you’re the biggest whore in town, YOU will ALWAYS have that upper hand. There’s a reason he complains about his child’s mother girls! He needs to make you feel secure, wanted and special because YOU didn’t carry his seed. And I’m sorry but the relationship he has with his child’s mother will always be special, no matter how twisted that might sound. As much as my ex and I have been through, we also went through two beautiful births. And even though he might make it seem otherwise to the outside world, he respects me and would do anything for me. I know this. And so does he. That’s all that matters.

My ex-husband said to me the other day, “I swear, you are THE BEST EX-WIFE ever”. We laughed together hysterically for 3 minutes and when I could finally breathe, I said, “I know. You’ll never find another one like me”.

He’s NOT just my children’s father. Me and him? We’re united in more ways than anyone will ever know. And I know he respects me more simply because I’ve never given him any drama. I’m better than that.

Peace and love always.


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